Sleep. Eat. Shower.Walk

I hit a moment

the lowest of the day so far

on my knees

and I was so far

from where I prefer to be

which is happier

within me

 

check list I booted to play

to help me get up

attempt to enjoy my day

 

eat

sleep

shower

walk

 

those are the choices

I give to self

and I view this knowledge

as my wealth

 

and I went to bed last night

just after my son

before even the sun

and rest my brain

relieve the mess

so tired was I

couldn't even undress

 

and there I laid

didn't here my son sneak in

was so grateful not to wake alone

in this house I now question

is it a home?

 

and it will be

because I will make it so

and if I make it so

then it shall be

and I crave the power

the energy

to push this motion through

 

so sleep I could tick

and took an hour to remember the list

just sad here

quagmire tryst

and put all my energy to my heels

get up

get up

get up

as I felt frozen

stalled in this spot

get up and fight sophie

get up

get up

choose the fight

use whatever is left

don't abandon yourself

to your mess

 

and I rocked my energy

from my heels

to my toes

and in one big push

I lifted of this chair

and I was up

and I could see

into my half drunk coffee cup

and where was I to go?

out of energy

I just couldn't think

didn't know

and I looked at the fridge

and thought EAT

remembered your message

and that gave me the push

 

and I thought I knew

what there was to eat

I thought I knew

that there was nothing in there

that id like to eat

but I still tried

opened the door

bent in

and puzzled I saw

something I hadn't put there

pulled it out

took off the upturned bowl

 

tears fell

I let them flow right now

just let them go

I don't want them

as I let them go now as I ride this

and I cut it in half

tears flowed

with each mouthful

I had cut it in two

half for me

half for you

but I will eat it all

and know its just how its meant to be

and know

im allowed it all

that this is just for me

in this moment I want to be

 

and I can tick

Eat

and I feel the love from the inside out

and I feel it heal and oil the old shelf

and I play adele 25

wash my brain

with sound

wash my heart with another's lyrics

 

I go back to rest

so much energy I used

to grit my teeth

keep my head up

and walk through the day

and I say to self

stop

stop it

stop thinking

relax

let the adrenaline pass

and to you I say

think of me as just away

if you need my just shout

im just finding a better way

for us all a better way

a better life

with no happiness tax

just a simpler

peaceful

way

of thriving

and im past the worst

and on my way

out